Design that Matters Field Journal

Footprints in My Memory

The most memorable moment I have embedded in my head is when we came out of Dogon Country. Watching the sunrise over the cliffs was a breath taking experience but witnessing the poverty and the reality that the people lived through was like throwing cold water on me in my sleep. Our guide had hired some teenagers to carry our bags for us. At first we saw it as a way for them to get out of their daily chores and earn some extra money but I began to observe more closely the feet of the girl who was carrying my bag.

Her heels hung out behind her beat up flip-flop sandals. Bright red blood glistened in the sun from a few cuts on her feet. I just felt horrible as I followed behind her in my $70 hiking boots with nothing on my back. Tim tried to take the bag and carry it for her but she just ran ahead and refused to be called weak by her peers. She was strong enough to do it. I watched as she flirted with one of the other teenage boys who carried another bag and I admit that her mind was not on her painful feet, but I couldn't get over it. When we reached the car I had already decided that I was going to give her my generic Teva sandals. She needed them much more than I did.

When I gave them to her she didn't know what to do with them or how to put them on. So I unstrapped them and helped her to ease her painfully blistered feet into them. She didn't ask for my shoes or for help from any of us, but the guilt weighed so heavily in my mind that it was the only reasonable and Christian thing to do. The girl thanked me several times and wore a big smile as she showed off her new shoes to her friends. After I got up I had to walk away to keep from crying in front of everyone.

The events of that day keep coming back to me sometimes haunting me in my sleep. Did I do the right thing? Will she think now that each time she carries a heavy bag for a white person that she will be given a nice "castaway" item from the Western world? Will she learn to take care of herself or will she let the boys she flirts with hurt her? There are many grim realities here in Mali and in other parts of the world, including the US. What I have learned towards the end of this trip is that even if I go around giving up all my belongings, though it is the Christian thing to do, I will only end up naked after helping a small number of people. I will teach people to depend on handouts and the kindness of strangers rather than depending on themselves.

I think Design that Matters is trying to make the greatest impact for the most people, not by giving away free computers that they cannot maintain themselves, but by providing them with valuable tools to help them help themselves for a better future. This trip has also helped four students from the US to learn valuable lessons that cannot be taught in 4 years, even at MIT.